Thursday, April 13, 2006

Noodhanam !

"Hello !"


"Im calling from AirBell. This is for your address verification.. You card is marked for deactivation.. Can you please come to the AirBell office, before 2 PM today.."

"What ? No, Im busy right now.. i dont understand why it is being deactivcated.."

"Sir, its just a simple formality.. if you are busy can you send someone else with your address proof"

"No. thats not possible.. why the hell are you deactivating my connection.. I have to know the reason now.."

"Sir, Im just a helpdesk executive. Can you atleast tell me over phone your address details ?"

"Yeah.. thats better"

"You can just tell me the details, and i shall verify it. Your Full name as you gave while enrolling for AirBell ?"

"Bharat Kumar Selvamani"

"Your Address is "

"F2 RTS Flats East Mada Street, Ayanavaram"

"Your Company Name and Full address.."

"Infowares Technologies, Teynampet, Chennai."

"Since when are you having this Conenction.."

"Feb 2006.."

"thank you sir.. I have verified the address and they are right. I will communicate to the communication center.."

"yeah.. whatever.."


a few days later

"Hello.. Can i talk to Mr. Bharat..."

"Yes. "

"Bharat, im calling from Nixor People Management services. We learnt that you are a Software Engineer at Infowares.. How many years of experience do you currently posses ?"

"3 Years.."

"Well, We have an opening that suits your profile. This has an onsite opportunity for six months and then extendable based on the performance... If you dont mind can you tell me your current CTC ?"

"4.5 Lacs per annum"

"And.. what would be your expectation, Bharat ?"

"ill be happy with anything above 5.4 lacks.."

"Can you please tell me your email id.. Bharat.."


"Thanks Bharat, I will get in touch with you later.."


and a few more days later


"hello Sir.. can i talk to Mr. Bharat"


"Good evening Mr. Bharat. We are calling from IVKI Bank. Sir, you have been selected for our Gold Card program. Sir, would you like to enroll for a lifetime free gold card offer ?"

"No .Thanks.. Im not interested"

"Sir, Please let me brief you on the key features of this card. Sir, this Gold card from IVKI Bank is a Lifetime free card. Sir, we are offering you very very low interest rates, and you can pay after 45 days of purchase.."

"Look.. im not interested.."

"Sir, we are offering a 1 week trip to Colombo as an introductory offer. You can also win a Maruthi Swift on a lucky draw.."

"1 week trip to colombo.. for everyone who sign up ?"

"Yes sir.. It is a very limited offer sir.. a win-win game. Would you like to join.."

"Yes.. but i dont want to hurry.."

"Sir, I can ask our representative to contact you in your home... Assuming you are in office right now, when will you be at home.."

"Can you ask him to come to my office.."

"No. sir.. we can ask him to visit home anytime you want.. "

"No.. I reach home only by 11.30 PM... "

"Oh.. I can have him drop the broucheres to anyone at home, today evening.. You can fill it up, and drop it in any of our banks..."

"Well, no one is at home... You understand my situation ? please ask him to come to my office.."

"Alright sir.."


Just 3 calls will do. Whats your number ?

1 comment:

tt_giant said...

Nice ones Keerthi!. So is this how they call during office hours? But why even pick up the call when one doesn't know the number?

Also, when will the shameful habit of asking people their salary go?

BTW, Happy new year