Friday, January 19, 2007

Thanvinai

I cant believe I'm burning midnight oil and working like hell to meet delivery dates. I'm stuck up with insomnia. Im not going to let this happen to me. At least Im not going to work this weekend. I’ve already denied a disguised request. Im going to relax in the best possible way. I’ve asked my fellas to make plans to chill the weekend. Im sure they have.

Friday evening. Wow. The dark clouds are moving out. The horizon looks bright. My weekend has begun. Iam going home. Home sweet home.

I switch off my mobile. Somehow that puts a grin on my face. I have my dinner. Dinner certainly is delicious at times when I am not dozing while eating. I go to my computer, and start checking my personal emails. I’m becoming less responsive to personal emails. Is that something that makes us loose friends? Im not sure.

Im done with all that. I check for movie tickets availability. I book them for tomorrow evening. All done. Im about to shutdown and hit the bed. Hitting the sack by 11 PM is something I’ve never done for the past four weeks. Im not feeling that sleepy. I wonder what else I can do on the Internet. I can probably check my official emails. But I don’t want to do that. I shouldn’t. I expect an appreciation email and it would make my day, if it had come. I log into my Office email system.

I’ve got some bunch of emails. There is an appreciation email. I expected a better one, but this would suffice. Just as I was about to close the window, I find another mail coming in.

It is from onsite. The subject says “Call me !”. God Damn ! Why did I open my office inbox. B*******.

I couldn’t ascertain my own reactions. I simply get up and switch off the main power and walk to the bedroom. I leave the lights on and fall on the bed. I have my cell-phone nearby. Im not sure if I should switch it on. If I did, im sure im not going to sleep for the next few hours. It might even tax me with the whole of Saturday.

I feel restless. You cant have a peaceful mind when guilt and self-pity are fighting with against each other. I want both to win the battle.

I think TV should help. Some distraction to the mind. I leave my mobile on the bed. Always stay away from things that might remind you of guilt. That doesn’t make you innocent, but makes you forget that you are guily. I switch on to the movies channel. Appada. One good movie. I’ve seen that already, but who cares. I just need to keep my mind numb, free from any form of thought. It is ok, even if I sleep on the couch.

The movie keeps me occupied for some 20 minutes. The movie is very entertaining.. whoosh ! what was that ?? Power cut. Che ! I stay put on the couch for sometime. I hear some crackles outside the door. I walk out. Its totally dark. I don’t want to risk it. I simply walk back in and stammer towards the landline phone. I call the EB fellas.

“The number you are calling is busy. Please try again later.”

Again

“The number you are calling is busy. Please try again later.”

Again

“The number you are calling is busy. “. Fuck !

I slam down the receiver, and fall back to the couch. I think for sometime. Then I go pick up the mobile and switch it on. It starts ringing the moment it is on. Its them.

“Hello !”, I said.

------------------------------------------------- End of story (What ? You call that a story ??) ---------------

This is just a question to people who can relate this to their lives.
If that person were you...
What would you do ? What should we do ?

2 comments:

prabukarthik said...

Huh! oru IT services company la velai seyyura payyan veetukku poradhey avanuku kudutha privilege madhiri....
idhile enna dhairiyam irunda konjam kooda lease illama er.. ownership illama initiative illama proactiveness illama
cell phone a off panni vechu..
cha cha enna kevalam idhu!

monu said...

thats y my i dont have a comp at home.
i do have a thagara dabba that used to work when i was in college.
not anymore

i totally stay away from comps and mails and blogs when at home.

:)

well, but if the phone rings, then gone. i would go and finish the work as qucik as possible so i can come back to my peace.

and amke sure i get either a comp off or some money for it, for i need to compensated for my personal time.